7 Stages of Acceptance
by WeakLove
Summary: It all happened so suddenly. One day, they were fine until- BAM! Naruto sees something about Sasuke that he rather wouldn't have like to. Join us, as Naruto goes through the 7 horrid Stages of Acceptance and as Sasuke tries... TRIES to keep his composure.
1. Why me?

_Another little something by me, hope that you guys like this  I know I do._

Title: 7 Stages of Acceptance

**Disclaimer: As much as I'd like to… I don't own Naruto.**

**Excerpt:**

**One of the questions always asked at the beginning stages: Why me? What did I do to deserve this? **

**How many times have you heard yourself say this? This stage may appear as a period of depression or it may linger on with unexplained bouts of crying.**

_Ah… -pant pant- Ngh… Gods…_

Naruto peeked his eyes open, meeting the darkness of his bedroom. What was that noise?

_-groan- Nnn…ah, shit!_

That sounded like Sasuke. Naruto sat up in bed, frowning as he rubbed the sleep out of his eye.

It was in the middle of the night, and the two had been rooming together ever since Naruto's small apartment was infested with rats. That was five months ago, and even though the rats were long gone, Naruto chose to stay. The rent was nearly double where he use to stay and here, it was cheap and more room.

The nineteen year old ninja looked over at his alarm. _'Two o'clock. Fuck.'_

He _would've_ roll back over and went back to sleep, but the noise wouldn't stop. It seemed to echo through out the apartment. Was Sasuke watching a porno?

Naruto snickered. If he caught Sasuke in the act, he'd never let the Uchiha live it down. He got up, sneaking out of the room with a small lecherous grin and stealth only a ninja could have.

The blond had opened his door wide enough for him to slide his body through. The floor in the hallway was carpeted, so all he needed to do was walk lightly.

He passed the bathroom, when he noticed something. There was only one TV in the house and that was in the living room, and there wasn't any light in there. _'He's in his room… so much for catching him watching a porno.'_

He turned around to walk back to his room. He didn't want to see his best friend masturbating. One, its something every man does, and two, it would just be plain embarrassing. He wanted to catch the almighty Uchiha, watching porno because it meant that Sasuke went out of his way to **buy** it. If Sasuke ever did get caught watching porn, then there would be no way for anyone get out alive.

_Mmm… ah!…Nngh, oh fuck!_

Naruto's acute ears could hear Sasuke's low voice. Sasuke was being awfully responsive. Naruto never made that much noise. Maybe the Uchiha only masturbates once every blue moon. Now that right there would-

_-pant pant- Naruto… ah!_

-make you sensativ- _'What the fuck?!'_ Naruto's head snapped back at the slightly jarred door.

The blond couldn't stop his legs from tip toeing to the door, he couldn't stop his eyes from peeking in the slightly jarred door, and he definitely couldn't stop the gasp that came from his mouth.

The window's curtains were open and on this particular night, the moon shun brightly, making Sasuke's naked body even more paler than usual.

Sasuke was laying on his back, in his bed, naked, writhing and had both hands between his long muscular legs. His lithe body seemed to be jerking when his left hand -the one that wasn't on his cock- moved.

And now that Naruto was focusing on Sasuke, the blond could hear a small humming sound.

'_!'_ Naruto put his hand over his mouth, and thanks to Kyuubi, his eyes could see a white dildo disappear into Sasuke rectum. He couldn't help but notice that the deeper the vibrator went, the more responsive Sasuke was.

"_Ah"_ Sasuke's voice seemed to be right next to his hair. _"Harder, Naruto.."_ the Uchiha spread his legs open wider, hiking his right leg up into the air.

Sasuke's left hand pulled the dildo out and shoved it back in harshly, and to Naruto, it seemed like it would hurt like hell; but it was different to Sasuke, who seemed to love it. _"Shit…Nngh… oh god, oh god!"_ the raven's voice was anxious, and low key.

Sasuke's right hand jerked his cock, and from the fervent movement, Naruto could tell he was close to completion.

Watching all of this, Naruto would've have never though that the Uchiha… that he would do something like this.

Everything became so clear. There were certain mornings when Sasuke seemed like he was in a good mood. Then later on, Naruto would notice that Sasuke had a small limp.

And Sasuke would be touchy. He would ruffle Naruto's hair, put his harm around Naruto, and even so much to playfully hitting him.

"_AH!"_ Sasuke's sudden cry brought him back to the real world. The one with Naruto watching Sasuke pleasure himself.

Sasuke continued to jerk his cock while his left hand shoved the dildo deep into his entrance, then proceeded to wiggle it around. Sasuke head tossed from side to side, eyes closed, teeth clenched, his bangs plastered on his forehead while the rest laid on the pillow.

Then after a couple of more rough shoves and Sasuke gritting his teeth, he came. Naruto, absently fascinated, watched the semen shoot and land on Sasuke's rapidly rising and falling chest.

The night was quiet with only the sounds of the Uchiha's, now, normal breathing. Just like how it was suppose to be during the night.

After basking in his after glow, Sasuke tentatively pulled out the vibrator, turned it off and sat up.

It hit Naruto that he needed to get out of here, unless he wanted to get caught. _'Hell no!'_

He quickly scuttled back to his room, closing the door quietly just in time for Sasuke to come out and go to the bathroom. Probably to clean himself up.

Then, as the blond sat down, something became very apparent.

Naruto was hard.

'_Oh my God!!'_ he stared down at his crotch, horridly with betrayal.

-

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Haruno Sakura slept quietly, enjoying the warmth and softness of her bed.

_Tap… tap, tap._

Sakura's face scrunched up. It was well known to the citizens of Konoha that the rosette was a very light sleeper. If a fly were buzzing around the room, she would wake up immediately and thus be in an awful mood.

_Tap… tap, tap._

Sakura growled, instantly awake and furious. What the fuck was that sound?!

She absently looked over at her window, and saw the dark silhouette of someone crouching on the tree branch outside.

_Tap… tap, tap_

Who the hell would be up at this ungodly hour. _'Its fucking three o'clock in the damned morning! Who ever this is, better be fucking important!'_

She growled as she peeked through her curtains. "What the-?" she didn't let herself finish, as she opened her window.

"_Naruto?!"_ She hissed, _"What the hell are you doing out here?"_

Naruto was dressed in his pajamas, a pillow under is arm in the tree next to her window _"I need somewhere to sleep right now."_ he whispered back.

"_What?! Why can't you sleep at your place?!"_ She looked up and down her street, then back down at Naruto, who suddenly had a weird look on his face.

Naruto wasn't whispering anymore. "Please, I really don't want to talk about it right now. I just need place to stay for the night. All I need is the floor to sleep on."

Sakura looked at him for a while longer, trying to figure out for her own why on earth Naruto was out here.

"Ok." She said, and moved to let him in. Naruto was an important person to her, she could never deny him anything.

-

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"Why me?" Naruto mumbled, tears flowing down his cheek; he was currently on the Hokage Mountain. "Why couldn't I just go back to sleep? Why did I have to get up and see all of that?! WHY?!" He yelled at the end, letting it echo over Konoha.

He hadn't gotten much sleep last night. Laying in his bed at home, Naruto couldn't seem to grasp the fact that he saw Sasuke in that kind of situation; he was constantly aware of what had just happened and what was still currently hard between his legs.

Naruto had refused to masturbate. The fact his own body responded to the same sight his minds thought was… horrifying? …sick? No, that isn't right. Sasuke was attractive, hell that was the soul reason every girl in Konoha was after him.

Naruto gasped,_ 'Does that mean I'm attracted to Sasuke?! My best __fucking__ friend?!'_ Naruto then sighed. Great. With those thoughts in his head, what was Naruto going to do when he really did finally talk to Sasuke.

Well anyway, after an hour of laying awake, and trying not to listen out for Sasuke, Naruto had finally had enough and went to Sakura's. Naruto hadn't gotten much sleep there. After seeing Sasuke once, Naruto was already bombarded with dreams of the raven. _'Jiraiya always said that if you fall asleep worrying about something, you'll dream about it.'_

After three hours there, Naruto had left her house and snuck back into his own, getting clothes and leaving immediately. The blond knew that he wouldn't be able to act normal, much less talk to Sasuke after what happened.

Naruto rubbed his eyes, he had been sitting here for a while now. "I need a mission. Something to do or give me time away from Sasuke." What Naruto really needed was some time to think. The blond found that he usually had enlightening periods of thought when he was on a mission. Strange, yes, but it was better than nothing.

But the sky was barely lit. The sun's rays could be seen around the horizon, coloring the clouds a pretty red-orange while the rest remained a blue hue, the underlining purple.

Quietly, Naruto sat down and continued to think.

The first was obvious. Sasuke wants to have sex with Naruto. That was the one thing Naruto was sure of.

What he wasn't sure of was for what reason. Did he want Naruto because of lust? "Or is it… l-lo…"

God! Naruto couldn't even say it. The thought didn't make him cringe or anything… hell, the thought of two men being together didn't bother him the slightest. It just… it was _Uchiha Sasuke!_ The same person who had vowed to kill his brother and kill his brother at the age of twelve! _Twelve!_ Naruto would've thought that Sasuke would have settled for a girl and do just that… not Naruto, his best friend.

He had heard of instances of best friends liking each other. Especially when they don't show any interest in anyone else or those of the same sex. Either way, sometimes it just a small crush and other times its border-line obsession. But Naruto was going to be Hokage in the near future… that alone gave Naruto obligations. It wouldn't do good to have a relationship with Sasuke, even though he knew that Konoha -the same village Naruto was being Kage for- expected him to start rebuilding his clan. The blond paused in his thoughts before groaning.

…God, Naruto just hoped Sasuke was confused.

'_I really hope so, but I know damn well its not so. Sasuke isn't the type to get confused.'_ Naruto huffed, placing his face into his hands.

Maybe Naruto should just go back to the apartment and confront the Uchiha about it… no that wouldn't work out. He would either end up hurting Sasuke feelings or… or something else he'd regret. And Naruto wasn't even sure of what that 'something else' was.

But still… that was the last thing he wanted to do. Naruto never wanted to hurt Sasuke.

And lets not forget that Naruto was hard after seeing Sasuke pleasuring himself. God, that right there, Naruto would never get over. He didn't even know where it came from.

The way Sasuke was so responsive. The way he wiggled and breathed. Naruto could only imagine what Sasuke would be like if it was **actually** Naruto insid-

"Ok, that's enough of that." Naruto had a blush on his face. It was hand to accept that Naruto was attracted to his best friend. _'Who wouldn't be…'_ He held his bright red face in his hands.

'_Maybe I can just pretend that it never happened. Yeah. that's what I'll do. At least until I figure out what I can do about this.'_ Naruto sighed.

He then got up and made his way to Tsunade's office. Sunrise or not.

-

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-

The birds sung happily as Sasuke began to rouse. Last night, after waking up from a wet dream, Sasuke had indulged himself.

Usually, he just took a cold shower, but occasionally, Sasuke would masturbate.

And wow, did it feel great. The Uchiha sat up, wincing slightly. Well, except the dull ache, his muscles were relaxed, and his legs felt like they were pleasantly weighted down. Maybe he should lay down for a while longer.

Sasuke sighed deeply and decided against it. If he wanted to see Naruto this morning, he needed to get up now.

Sasuke felt for his roommate's chakra, and found none. He frowned, _'He isn't here?'_

Sasuke stood and walked/limped to Naruto room. There wasn't a note indicating that he had left on a abrupt mission or anything. There were clothes taken out of the drawers, but that was about it.

It hurt, kinda but Sasuke shook it off. Maybe the blond didn't have enough time to leave a note.

The door bell wrung, catching Sasuke's attention.

From the light chakra being willingly emitted from the front door, it was obviously a female.

'_Sakura.'_ The Uchiha was curious as to why she was here. She rarely visited him and Naruto at their apartment, mostly they meet somewhere because of their busy lives. Training grounds, Hokage tower, or usually at some restaurant, but never at one another's house.

And now that Naruto was rooming with Sasuke after some 'wild' rats infested the blond's apartment, Sakura still hardly ever came by.

So here is the deal, Sasuke had been infatuated with Naruto ever since the Chuunin Exams. Simple. He had told Sakura the reason why he wasn't interested in her, and who he was interested in. He had obviously told her after coming back from Orochimaru and a year of probation. They had both matured a lot during that time, so Sakura took it well.

Over the years, Naruto had grown. Just plain grown. He became more mature, taller, sexier, smarter, and a hell of a lot more responsible. All of this and more only made Sasuke feel more things for the blond. His heart pounds when he smiled at Sasuke, and Sasuke caught himself staring at the most weirdest things. Eyes, lips, neck, stomach (especially after they just got done training… or when he came out of the shower), legs, ass, most of all, Naruto's crotch. _'And he looks like he has a nice package.'_ he fantasized for a bit before sighing.

And Sasuke was perfectly fine with admiring from afar.

When they had grown older, Sasuke had found that they had grown apart. They had their own priorities that they had to worry about, their own lives and occupations. Sasuke was allowed to become an ANBU after his probation period, Sakura work full time at the hospital and _still_ took on missions, and Naruto was a 'special' jounin working under Tsunade-sama. The former Team Seven hardly seen each other in weeks sometimes months at a time.

Naturally Sasuke didn't take it well. At all. He knew that he couldn't cling to Naruto without making the blond uneasy… Naruto hadn't even shown any sign of attraction to the same sex, and all Sasuke wanted to do was stay close to the blond. Matter of fact, Naruto hadn't shown any interest in _anyone._ What could he do?

So he came up with the insidious plot of breeding rats and setting them lose in Naruto's apartment. Brilliant, eh?

It had only taken two months to breed and raise three hundred of those little bastards and successfully infiltrated them into Naruto's apartment, unnoticed. Then, when Team Seven arranged and met up for their usual lunch, Naruto would complaining about the rat problem, and Sasuke would 'selflessly' offered Naruto a place to stay.

Looking back on it, it wasn't the best and most honest thing Sasuke had ever done, but he was desperate at the time and was very happy with the end results. Seeing Naruto every day was way better than learning a new jutsu. It was exhilarating, it lightened his steps, and being around Naruto, overall, made his day so much better.

Sasuke opened his front door, Sakura speaking first. "Ohayo Sasuke-kun. How are you doing?" She smiled sweetly, tilting her head cutely to the side. _'Something's up.'_

"I'm doing fine." Sasuke motioned to his clothes. "I just woke up. What brings you here?"

His only response was a shrug.

The two made their way to the kitchen and quietly sat at the table when the rosette finally asked, "Is Naruto here?"

Sasuke frowned. Something was definitely up. If she was looking for Naruto, then she would've check if his chakra was here… just like he had when he had woken up.

"Something wrong?" Sasuke cut to the chase.

"I was going to asked the same thing." She matched Sasuke's frown. "Naruto paid me a visit around three last night."

"Three?" It sounded absurd! Why would the dobe be out and about at that time of night?

"Yup. I could tell that there was something wrong, but he said he couldn't tell me yet." Sakura explained, making Sasuke worry even more. _'Well, at least I know he isn't on a mission… but still, why would Naruto get up at three in the morning and stay over at Sakura's house? What would be wrong with him staying here?'_

The rosette saw her teammates as brothers. Brothers that needed to be cared for because of the lack of family. Especially Naruto. When Sasuke was gone, the two had grown especially close. Sakura had always stressed to them, that if they needed anything, she'd help them out.

So, she was naturally worried when Naruto appeared outside of her window. Whatever was bothering Naruto was something big. And even when she laid the futon down on the floor, Naruto tossed and turned all night, until he left a couple of hours later.

"I had thought that you two had gotten into one of those fights, since he came from here. He was still wearing his night clothes, when I let him in. But since you don't know what's wron-" That was all Sasuke heard.

Naruto had left their own home to go to Sakura's, the same night Sasuke… indulged himself.

'_He saw… or at least heard me.'_ Sasuke's eyes widened. It was the only thing that would explain it. What other reason would there be?! _'Fuck, and I even said Naruto's name!'_

"Maybe he had a weird nightmare- Sasuke? Hey, what's wrong?!" She saw the look of fear and horror on his face. She had never seen such an expression on the Uchiha.

Sasuke took a calming breath, _'Calm down… there is no way to sugar coat it, but Naruto saw me. There isn't anything I can do about that part, but there is something I can do about what happens next.'_ The thought alone was embarrassing as hell. The person he had longed for his whole life had seen him in his most intimate moment. Sasuke mentally shook it off, before setting a determine look on his face. He needed to set some things straight with Naruto before he came to something absurd. They needed to talk.

The rosette watch Sasuke abruptly stand and leave the kitchen, "Show yourself out Sakura. I'm going to find Naruto."

-

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"…is there something wrong?" Tsunade's amber eyes were laced with worry.

'_Sometimes its scary when she does that.'_ Naruto smiled, or at least tried to. The Godaime always had a way of reading him like no other. "Its nothing, baa-chan. I just would like a mission, you know? I need something to take my mind off of… something." he said, deluding.

The Hokage didn't like that answer, "You want to talk about it? I'm told I'm a very good listener." She leaned forward, trying to get something, _anything_ out of him. If there was something wrong with her successor, then she wanted to be the first to know about it.

Naruto's blue eyes soften, "Thanks baa-chan, but… could I get a mission?"

The two sat in a long heavy silence, Tsunade trying to think of a way out of giving in, and Naruto trying to stand strong against the hard gaze.

Then a sigh, taking a scroll from her desk, the sannin wrote a brief paragraph. "B-rank." Tsunade handed him a scroll, "Deliver this to the Kazekage and wait for him to give you another scroll. Take your time getting back."

Naruto smiled, "Thanks baa-chan."

He grabbed the scroll, but Tsunade kept it in a firm grip. "I expect something when you get back. And I'm not talking about the Kazekage's return scroll."

The smile didn't fade from the other's face, "Sure."

Tsunade then let go and no later, Naruto teleported out of the office.

Naruto then jumped, roof top to roof top, back to his home. _'Where Sasuke is…'_ he needed to go home and get some clothes for the trip. Sand was so uncomfortable when it got into your clothes, and could literally rub your skin away.

'_It is around nine… I'm sure Sasuke has probably left the house.'_ Naruto though optimistically. _'But if I do see him, I'll act like nothing has happened. Sasuke is my best friend, I won't lose him over something like this.'_

Upon his arrival, Naruto couldn't feel the raven's chakra in the apartment. "Coast is clear." The blond unlocked the door but stopped when it came to opening it.

The blond felt the Uchiha's chakra pulse, resounding all across Konoha. This was something only Team Seven did. When ever the three needed to find the other, they would pulse out three consecutive chakra waves.

There was chakra pulses through out Konoha, so any other ninja wouldn't notice. But the fact that Team Seven's chakra was unique, made it even better for them.

Sakura's chakra was hard but soft to the senses. So when you felt it, it left you feeling warm and fuzzy.

Sasuke's chakra, was solid too; but when it hit you, it left you feeling tingly. Like small little pricks were being made to your skin. It wasn't painful, but it caught your attention.

And Naruto was feeling small pricks all over his body, constantly hitting him from the direction Sasuke was. _'He can wait.'_ Naruto hurriedly went to his room, packing his things and leaving only in five minutes.

He arrived at the gates, and paused. It was obvious Sasuke was looking for him. Sakura had already answered with her own pulses and yet he still didn't stop.

'_Sasuke will probably be mad if I don't answer back.'_ Naruto bit his lip. _'I'll at least tell him that I'll be away on a mission.'_

Naruto took a huge deep sigh, before unmasking his chakra and sending a three pulses. Sasuke had stopped his chakra pulses immediately and started heading his way.

_Closer, closer, closer…_

He waited, suddenly feeling the urge to fidget.

Suddenly, Sasuke jumped out of a tree and was in visual distance. _'Must act normal.'_ Naruto waved sheepishly.

Sasuke didn't seem to like this at all. "Why haven't you been answering?"

"_Ah" Sasuke's voice, echoed in the room. Naruto panted, thrusting harder into the ravens hot canal, trying earnestly to draw more of Sasuke's sexy responses-_

Naruto blinked hard, willing his imagination to stop. "Sorry, I've been kinda busy."

"Where were you this morning?" Sasuke crossed his arms, "Sakura said you left the apartment to go sleep over at her house, _in the middle of the night._"

'_Dammit!'_ Naruto hadn't expected for Sakura to go over and tell the Uchiha all of this! Oh she was **so **getting an earful later.

"Uh," Naruto looked away, desperately trying to find something useful to say. "I couldn't go to sleep."

"Don't lie to me." If one hadn't known Sasuke, he would've sounded angry. But to Naruto, Sasuke sounded hurt.

"Really! I couldn't sleep!" Naruto tried earnestly to get Sasuke to believe him, but the Uchiha was having none of it. Those black eyes looked into his and seemed to pick apart his entire being.

"…you saw me… didn't you?" Sasuke looked away, a extremely small blush on his cheeks.

It was a very good thing Sasuke wasn't looking at the blond, cause Naruto's eyes nearly popped out of his head. _'God! Sasuke knows?!'_

"…er, what are you talking about?" The blond scratched his head, trying to act natural. Naruto really didn't need this! Dammit! Why did Sasuke have to come and make things difficult! Naruto needed to think, not talk!

Sasuke eyes snapped up, "Don't play stupid, Uzumaki." he took a step closer. "You saw me last night ple-"

"_**LA LA LA! I CAN'T HEAR YOU! LA LA LA!!**_" Naruto suddenly yelled covering his hears and closing his eyes. When all else failed, act childishly.

Sasuke launched himself at the blond, pulling his hands away from his ears. He should've known the dobe would do something like this! Naruto may have gotten more mature, but he always had these little bouts of childishness when nothing went his way.

"Dammit Naruto! You saw me pleasuring myself! I know you did! And I know that you heard me sa-"

"Let me go teme!" Naruto tried to yank his hands away. _'Sweet mother of-'_ blue eyes looked at the pale hands and images of last night flashed uncontrollably in his mind. _'Those were the same hand that were-! I GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE!'_

They looked absolutely ridiculous. Naruto and Sasuke looked like a mother trying to control her child while yanking on their arm.

Suddenly, the ground seemed to come from under Naruto's feet, and slam into his back. Sasuke had kicked his feet from under him, and quickly pinned his wrists.

Sable eyes started down at him, "I don't want you to leave and come to some absurd conclusion, dobe. I'm attracted to you, always have been, probably always will be."

Everything went silent and the birds in the forest were completely oblivious to the small scuffle on the forest floor. The world didn't care what went on in Naruto's life and even seemed to mock him a bit as it kept on turning.

Slowly, Sasuke let go of Naruto's wrists but didn't bother getting up.. Naruto laid there, looking at his with unreadable eyes.

Sasuke's mouth moved on its own, forming words he never thought of saying. "I knew that you would have found out sooner or later Naruto, so I want to say some things before you even have a chance to think."

Naruto kept his mouth shut.

"All I wanted in the beginning was to be near you, I was fine with just that." Sasuke sat up placing all his weight on his legs. "But after a while, I kept wanting more. More, more, and more." Sasuke sat back, knees on either side of Naruto's hips and placed some of his weight on Naruto's outstretched legs. "I know that I don't deserve you after how I treated you when I went to Orochimaru, but I can't help but want to try… so… can you at least give me a chance to show you…" clenching his eyes shut, Sasuke trying to find it in him to continue. "…how much I love you?"

'_So,'_ Naruto sat up on his elbows, tentatively glancing up at Sasuke. _'He does love me.'_

Naruto had never seen Sasuke like this. To see the strong and proud Uchiha ask… and dare he say, begging for this?

'_There's no way I could…'_ Naruto slipped out from underneath the raven. Walking over to his travel bag and putting it on.

"Naruto?" Sasuke looked as if he wanted to reach out to him. The look of confusion and anxiousness looked so out of place on the Uchiha's face. Naruto didn't like it at all.

"I-I don't know what to say, Sasuke." Naruto tried to keep his voice controlled.

"You don't have to say anything now." The response was a little too fast, as if Sasuke was afraid that Naruto already had his answer. "I'll wait for your answer until after your mission."

Naruto frowned. "Sasuk-" he stopped and looked, _really_ looked at Sasuke.

The Uchiha had hid it very well, just like he did with all of his emotions, and if Naruto was any other person he probably would have never noticed, but… the raven was trembling. Uchiha Sasuke was actually shaking.

"Ok." Naruto whispered. "I'll be gone for a few days and I'll tell you my answer when I get back from Suna." If it really meant that much to the Uchiha, then Naruto would wait to tell him until after the mission.

Sasuke watched Naruto walk away. There. He had finally done it. He had finally told Naruto how he had felt and was still breathing. Naruto knew about this feelings and until he came back to Konoha, he would give Sasuke the one answer that could decide whether it was friendship or a relationship.

But even if they stayed best friends… it would never be the same. The Uchiha had completely changed everything between them.

Sasuke took a shaky breath. Time was both his enemy and friend at the moment. Time would allow Naruto to come to a decision, for or against, and it would also torture Sasuke until then.

He then walked back to his house.

_So, I had a plot bunny attack me in the weirdest place, and I just **had** to write this out... but I don't know if it is good or not /_

_So please review :) it'll depend on whether or I'll continue or not!_

_Sh-love you!_


	2. Frustration and Depression

_Here chapter two! Hope you guys like it.. I tried to get this out to you as soon as I can!_

Title: 7 Stages of Acceptance

**Disclaimer: As much as I'd like to… I don't own Naruto.**

**-**

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**Excerpt:**

**Second Stage: Frustration And Depression**

**Constant minor problems that disappear and reappear often cause feelings to fluctuate between "is this all in my head", to the reality that the "minor" problems are having a serious effect upon being able to function. There is a sense on "losing control" of mental and physical functions when the patient is unable to go out socially. Chronic fatigue may be a cause as well as an effect of depression. Stress is complicated by efforts to perform all duties and appear normal for fear of being labeled a "neurotic" or a "hypochondriac" (somebody with imaginary illness).**

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It sucked.

Sasuke walked into his apartment that he shared with Naruto, taking his shirt off. It was spring, humid, incredibly hot, and on this particular day, Sasuke decided to wear black. _'Bad choice.'_

It had been a week since Naruto had left. Seven days coming home and not seeing Naruto. 10,080 minutes of walking around, knowing that Naruto wasn't in the village. 604,800 seconds of thinking whether or not the blond had come to his final decision.

It _really_ sucked.

And Sasuke was suffering the whole time. He found that he had lost his appetite, couldn't sleep, and that he couldn't even hold a kunai properly. It seemed that everything was off about the Uchiha when Naruto wasn't around.

Walking into the bathroom, undressing to take a shower to cool himself off, Sasuke continued to brood. Naruto hadn't been specific when he was going to return from his mission. _'I don't even know what rank it is.'_

The shower on, water cascading down his pale body, Sasuke cursed himself for not asking.

Sasuke had had three missions while Naruto was gone. One lasted a few hours with in the village. Two were outside the village, but he was away around five hours at the most. The rest of his time was spent thinking, training, thinking, trying to eat, thinking, and just plain lounging around.

After a few more minutes of brooding, Sasuke ended his shower and walked to his room, stark naked while toweling his hair. It was a bad habit of his, that Naruto had once said that he needed to break.

"_What would happen if you left the curtains open in your room while you were changing?" Naruto wagged his finger at him, smiling. "Your fan girls would love to get pictures of you naked… and they might even get a profit off of it!" He laughed at Sasuke's frowning face._

Sasuke stopped drying his hair, letting the towel rest on his shoulders. It felt like ages since he and Naruto just sat down and talked. Ages since he'd seen hide or hair of the blond, ages since he'd seen Naruto's blue eyes or even his smile. Sure it was cliché to say… but Naruto made Sasuke want to say optimistic and sentimental things like, "If you want, I'll run away with you" or, "I'll take care of everything. Just wake up in the morning, and I'll handle it from there" and maybe even, "I'm your slave, use me as you wish".

Which was odd, because Sasuke probably would never thought about saying those things before. He was a ninja. A realist. Things like that don't work in the real world.

But running away with Naruto wouldn't be so bad… and he would take care of things for Naruto… but he doubted the blond would let him do it completely. And a slave? Wow, Sasuke was for sure Naruto wouldn't want a slave. _'Although being his sex slave doesn't sound bad.'_

Sasuke looked, seeing that his curtains were open, and walked over to close them. _'I miss him.'_ That much Sasuke knew, but his heart ached at the thought. This was the one reason why Sasuke went through all that trouble to get the blond to live with him. So he wouldn't have to miss him like this. So he wouldn't suffer the way he was.

'_Come back soon, Naruto.'_

-

-

-

-

The Kazekage of Suna sat in his office silently. His red hair had grown slightly over the years and was long for a male living in the hot scorching desert. Even girls rarely grew their hair out.

The wind blew in through his open window, slightly shifting his red bangs out of his face as he looked up at the ceiling, thinking.

The scroll Naruto had delivered had sparked interest in him. It had nothing to do with Konoha or Suna, or even Gaara for the matter. It was a simple request.

_**Kazekage,**_

_**The brat seems to be troubled at the moment, and I don't want to send him on a real mission. He might hurt himself if his head isn't on straight, so I thought I'd send him to you.**_

_**If it isn't too much of a bother, please keep him busy there for a week. I'm sure that'll be enough time for him to think things through. And if you find anything wrong with him, please don't hesitate to tell me. **_

_**-Tsunade**_

It was a completely unprofessional letter, but Gaara didn't mind one bit. Naruto was someone very important to him, and if Naruto needed time, then Gaara would give it to him.

Gaara had only given Naruto a small mission, only because he asked for it, that involved him helping set a roof on a house. The rest of the week, he let Naruto to do as he pleased.

"Kazekage-sama." A voice came from behind the door. "Uzumaki-san is here."

"Send him in." Gaara's voice was smooth and deep. He straightened himself as the door opened.

"Hey Sand-man! How's it going?" Naruto came in waving as closed the door behind him

"Everything is going good." Gaara stood, shaking the blond's hand. It had become a habit between them since Naruto had saved him those years back.

'_And now that I think about it.'_ Gaara allowed a small smile to appear on his face. _'This is the first time he has been in Suna in three years.'_

Uzumaki Naruto had grown to be a handsome man. The blond had let his hair grow out so that his famous spikes were somewhat tames and laid back. Gaara was sure that if it wasn't for the hitia-ate, he wouldn't be able to see the man's eyes.

Gaara allowed his eyes to roam Naruto's body shamelessly. Because of the Gaara's height, he only came up to about Naruto's shoulder, standing at 5' 8''.

Naruto was at least 6' 0"… or at least Gaara thought so. The red head let his eyes travel further, from those fine lines on Naruto's face, to his lips, broad shoulders, thin waist, and muscular legs.

"Uh… Gaara?" Naruto, still holding onto Gaara's hand, felt like a hunk of meat on a hook. He could practically feel the way those aquamarine eyes wandered over his body.

Gaara looked back up at him. "I'm just realizing how much you've grown."

He blinked once then smiled, accepting this as a suitable answer. "Well, that's what happened over the span of a couple of years."

Gaara nodded, releasing his hand. "I'm sending you back with Tsunade-sama's return message." He handed it to him. "I trust you can get it back to her safely."

Naruto stood up straighter, giving him a mock salute. "Hai, Kazekage-sama!"

Gaara gave him a dry look. He never did like it when Naruto called him by his title… and the blond knew that. "Naruto…"

Naruto snickered, patting him on the shoulder. "You know I will, Gaara." He tucked the scroll safely in his vest, winking at him playfully.

"Good." the red head smiled lightly. "Have a safe journey back, Naruto."

The other grin widely, clapping his hands on the Kazekage's shoulders. "It was good seeing you, Sand-man."

"Yes, its always a pleasure. Stop by whenever you're in the area." Naruto watched as those light eyes became soft.

A nod and Naruto turned to the door.

The door clicked shut, sounding more ominous than it should. _'Whatever is bothering him, I hope it isn't anything too big.'_ Gaara sighed, sitting down at his desk. He was alone again. The one person that understood his pain, sufferings and struggles was only with him for a short while. Gaara half wanted to be selfish and keep the blond longer, but Naruto wasn't an item he could play tug-o-war with.

Naruto needed to get back to his life, one way or another, and Gaara had no right to stop him.

-

-

-

-

A few hours later, the sand sloshed and gave way under Naruto's feet, making it slightly difficult to walk. The sand and the heat was the only thing he hated about the wind country.

It had been a full week since he'd been away from Konoha. A week of lounging around, training, and full of unwanted thoughts. A full week that both kicked Naruto's ass mentally, but needed physically.

And that was strange because, Naruto felt that he had a tremendous amount of sleep this week, but always woke up tired and grumpy. He had practically snapped at the hotel attendant when he left this morning. Naruto had wanted to leave early so he could get to Konoha by night fall.

She had politely asked if his stay was great, and Naruto had mumbled yes. Key word: mumbled. There had been no possible way she could have heard him and when she had said "excuse me?" He'd snapped and practically yelled "YES!!"

Naruto had profusely apologized afterwards. He wasn't the type of person that let things like that happen! Snapping at people was more of Sasuke's thing than Naruto's.

It seemed the stress of their conversation was still taking a toll on Naruto. And he knew it would, but he just didn't know to what extent. _'Or maybe its all in my head.'_

Naruto continued to trudge through the sand. If Naruto was fairing his well being on the receiving end, he could only imagine how Sasuke was doing. Blue eyes became darker at the thought of his best friend. Leaving Sasuke at the village's gates seemed like a distant dream. The look Sasuke had seemed torn. Glad that Naruto was wiling t think it over but wasn't willing to let the blond go.

"I'm going to let him know as soon as I get in and report to Baa-chan." Naruto continued walking through the sand that threatened to swallow him whole, "It seemed wrong to… make him wait…" Naruto clenched his teeth.

And as Naruto's predictions were, he got back by the time the sun set. The night watch man waved and Naruto's nodded in response. He had masked his chakra way before he came to through the gates. He didn't want Sasuke to find out that he was here, just yet.

Inside the Hokage's tower, Shizune greeted him. "You're back. How was the mission?"

"Good." Naruto gave a wide smile he was famous for. "Everything was still the same in Suna." he looked down the hall way, pointing at the office door, "She free?"

The raven smiled kindly, "Sakura-chan is in there, but I'm sure you can go on in."

Naruto surprised Shizune with a brief hug. "Thanks!" he turned and walked away. His foot steps resounded in light thumps as he walked down the hall. He could hear the muffled voices of the women in the office.

Naruto took off his bag, setting it outside the door, before knocking.

"_Come in!"_ Tsunade's voice came off as irritated. He definitely caught her at the wrong time. He wondered slightly if it was Sakura's doing. Those two had been arguing at hissing at each other a lot lately.

The bond walked in, his hands in the air. "I have returned, oh Great and Terrible Leader," his hands dug into his pocket, "baring gifts!" He smiled.

The rosette turned to him, smiling, forgetting her previous talk with Tsunade. "Naruto! You're back!"

Sakura was the only woman that was, weight and height wise, smaller than him and still able to pick him up. Naruto's eyes comically grew bigger as Sakura's arms went around his waist and lifted him, swinging him from side to side. "Sakura!! Put me down!!" He tried not to struggle in fear of being dropped. He never did like being carried.

Sakura set him down, smiling charmingly up at him. "How was the mission?"

"I was fine." Naruto smiled, "Are you free tomorrow? I'd like to talk to you." Even though a week had passed, Naruto was still sore that Sakura went and ratted him out to Sasuke.

"The rosette tilted her head, smiling. "I'll make time. Four?"

"Perfect." The blond nods.

"Ahem!" An apparent vein was protruding on the Hokage's fore head. "Sakura's I too would like to speak to you later."

"Hai!" Sakura' hugged Naruto one more time before leaving.

Naruto cleared his throat, "Here's the Kazekage's return scroll." he said as Tsunade drank some sake before reaching for it. _'Rough day?'_ Naruto rose a brow, smiling lightly.

Tsunade opened the scroll, reading it to herself.

_**Hokage,**_

_**I have kept Naruto, as you requested. From the looks of it, I don't think that there is anything particularity wrong with him. Everyone had problems, and we sometimes need to solve them ourselves.**_

_**If there is anything wrong later, please, I'd too would like to know.**_

_**And in the future, don't hesitate to send him again. I always do like his company.**_

_**-Gaara**_

The blond closed the scroll, looking at Naruto evenly.

She cut to the chase. "So… are you going to tell me the reason why you asked for a mission so hastily?" the Kazekage's response was to let Naruto deal with his own problems. In other words, to _"butt out"_. But this was her successor and if something was wrong, he wanted to be the first to know. Regardless of what they say.

'_Damn…'_ He had forgotten about that. "Er… can I talked about this tomorrow? I'm kinda tired." Naruto smiled sheepishly.

Tsunade didn't like this at all. _'Tired my fucking ass!'_ but it was a small request, and she had had a long… **very** long day. "I suppose this could wait 'til early in the morning."

Naruto smiled brightly. "Early in the morning it is."

'_I spoil him.'_ She smiled, waving him out the door. He gave a mock salute and walked out.

Outside, the streets of Konoha were emptying, husbands hurrying home for dinner, people closing up shop and cleaning off their porches for the next day. When he was younger, Naruto use to hate this time of day. The time when all the kids would go home to have dinner with their families, leaving him in these empty streets; not wanting to go home to an empty house.

The wind blew slightly, pulling his blond locks with it in a small wavy dance, a look of resignation but full of determination.. He needed to find Sasuke.

-

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-

-

Sasuke was found laying in his bed, wearing his boxers, at home. His curtain were open… just like that night a week ago. The moon still had its effect its luminous on the Uchiha's pale skin… Naruto frowned. Had Sasuke lost weight?

Naruto sat down on the edge of the bed, next to Sasuke. His rips were slightly more evident, and his arms seemed to be thinner too.

The blond didn't like this at all. A ninja losing weight was never a good thing. Muscle mass was important and keeping a good weight was even more so. _'Is he sick?'_ He had called for Sasuke with his chakra pulses and didn't get a response. The only place he could go was home and hope that Sasuke was here. Good thing he was right.

Sasuke started becoming aware of his surroundings, when the bed sunk in on the side. _'Who…?'_ his brain was unusually slow with his irregular sleeping and eating patterns.

The dark room in contrast with blond hair, seemed darker as tanned skin looked paler in the moon light. Blue eyes seemed to glow with worry, and Sasuke could feel them traveling over him. "Naruto?"

Naruto gave the Uchiha a tired smile. "Hey."

Sasuke blinked a couple more times. Naruto was back…

The Uchiha suddenly sat up, giving himself a head rush immediately. He sat there, clenching his eyes for a bit, before looking up in Naruto's, even more than worried, face. "W-when did you get back?"

Naruto gave him a pondering look, "I think an hour ago… I call for you with my chakra, but I didn't get an answer." Blue eyes were fixed on Sasuke… oddly making him somewhat nervous. Naruto was being Naruto. The Naruto that knew that Sasuke loved him, wouldn't look at him like this, hell he hadn't a week ago. Sasuke watched as Naruto stretched slightly before yawning… actual _yawning_. Was Sasuke going to be the only nervous here?

The Uchiha looked down at his hands placed in his lap. _'What should I say… should I bring it up or should we talk about it in the morning. Naruto did just get back from a week long mission in Suna.'_

"Sasuke… you know I love you, right?" Naruto said, turning his back to him to look out the window comfortably.

'_The 'beating around the bush' tactic.' _ Sasuke frowned but didn't verbally complain. It was better than nothing. Sasuke wouldn't be able to sleep tonight if they decided to talk in the morning. "I love you too." Sasuke said, but they both noticed the double meaning in it. The Naruto that had left a week ago, hadn't wanted to hear those words. He had wanted to stay friends but still loved him all the same.

Was this a Naruto that was willing to accept Sasuke. Did he not care about Sasuke's feelings? Was this why he was acting like this? If it was, Sasuke narrowed his eyes a bit, he didn't know what he'll do. One of the reasons why he loved Naruto was because he _wasn't_ heartless.

Naruto ran a hand through his hair, but it wasn't something born from nervousness. It had seemed casual, like this situation didn't matter at all to him. It only added more to the pessimistic flames burning in him.

They sat in silence a bit more Naruto spoke, "I have my answer… and I did a lot of thinking while I was away."

"Yeah?" Sasuke inquired needlessly, but trying to keep an even head. He felt dizzy for some reason. Was his previous head rush that bad?

Suddenly, Naruto started looking more nervous. "And… I've decided that…"

Sasuke clenched his eyes shut, waiting for it. He didn't breath at all.

"…that considering certain things, and… er…"

The raven could hear his heart pound in his ears. Could feel the way his blood pumped faster, due to the lack of oxygen and anticipation.

Naruto sat quiet before speaking the words that tore Sasuke's heart right out of his chest.

"I can't do it." Naruto looked up looking genuinely guilty, "I'm sorry, Sasuke."

Dull black eyes, stared at sad blue for a long while.

-

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-

-

The next couple of weeks, Naruto barely saw Sasuke. The world continued to turn, and along with that, their lives continued.

ANBU kept Sasuke busy. Tsunade kept Naruto busy, especially after he had told her what was going on between him and Sasuke. Naruto found out the next day after rejecting Sasuke, that Sakura knew about the Uchiha's feelings. Naruto had practically tore her ear drum out and stomped on it, letting her know that next time something like that happened, to keep it between them. She had reluctantly agreed after Naruto told her about what had happened between him and the raven.

Naruto, now currently in a room in the Hokage's tower, sighed. There were various scrolls around him, some had accumulated dust, and they all had important information in them. Some had Konoha laws, practices, and clan's ruling. Others were important dates, considering treaties, appointments and anniversaries.

Tsunade sent him in here to find something that had to do with the 57th law of Konoha… "Its suppose to be in scroll #007937" Naruto looked around, finding some scrolls in random boxes. "But how the hell am I suppose to find it in this mess?"

Tsunade had given him another impossible task and so thus, Naruto continued searching. His thoughts went back to Sasuke. _'The last time we've talk, and I mean, really talk was that night.'_

That god awful night. The one night that had completely changed everything. Naruto sneezed as dusk came into contact with his nose. That night, Naruto hadn't slept at all. All he could do was lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. And in the morning, Sasuke was already gone for the day… and Naruto couldn't blame him. He could only imagine how he felt. Naruto would've done the same thing if he was in Sasuke position.

But this was an ongoing thing. He hardly ever saw Sasuke anymore. The only time Naruto had seen the Uchiha was in the morning. The blond would be waking up and walking into the kitchen and Sasuke would already be dressed and heading out the door.

Naruto picked up a box, setting it on the desk, his brooding mood changing rapidly. Sasuke would never wake up before him! _'And now that it is convenient for him,'_ Naruto angrily slammed some scrolls to the side, not even paying attention to what he was doing. _'he avoids me at the most crucial time!'_

It hurt. Naruto had distinctly said to Sasuke that he still wanted his friendship. Sasuke was still a precious person to him… there would be no way Naruto could ever live without the raven. It hurt even worst because, now, Sasuke was avoiding him. Completely.

This was what sucked about having intimate relationships with your friends. Sometimes when it was over, there isn't anything left to salvage. They didn't want anything to do with you anymore. _'Is that was Sasuke is doing now? Since he didn't get what he wanted, he doesn't want to even be in the same room as me anymore?'_ Did Sasuke really love him? How could he be acting like this, if he really did? Do people go from loving to hating in minutes? Was there no way to control those fluctuating feelings?

The door opened quietly behind him and with the blond mentally ranting, he didn't hear anything.

Naruto gritted his teeth. _'When did things change?!'_ it was a rhetorical question, but despite that his shoulders slumped, the feeling of control was lost to him. The blond couldn't believe that this was happening. _'I…'_ His blue eyes were dull with depression. _'I miss my best friend.'_

The blond's mood did a complete 180, grabbing the box full of scrolls and throwing it against the wall. "Damn that bastard!!" the full box made a satisfying sound as it crashed against the wall. Sure it made Naruto feel better but he realized that he had to pick up those scrolls.

"Dobe," A smooth deep voice came from the door. "I hope you're not talking about me."

Naruto's head snapped at the door, Sasuke leaning against the frame. Blue eyes shone with anger. How dare he just show up now!! Acting as if everything was alright, that he wasn't avoiding Naruto! "And if I was?" In Naruto's eyes, every problem he had right now was Sasuke fault. The Uchiha's decision to masturbate that night, to confess and make Naruto come to a decision and most of all, _avoiding him!!_

The raven rose a brow, stepping forward. "Then I'll have to ask what I did?" Was he seriously asking that question?! _'He seriously is!!'_ "Then I'll say that I've seen less of you theses past weeks than before you confessed to me!" Naruto barked out.

Sasuke visibly tensed, knowing what Naruto was claiming. "I'm sorry that I've been conveniently busy!" The Uchiha stepped closer, in Naruto's personal space, nostrils flared with clenched teeth. "Don't assume that just because you didn't give be a chance, that I'll just up and start avoiding you!"

"Well what the hell do you want me to assume?!" Naruto rose his voice slightly, both of them in each other's faces.

The next words were what caught the blond off guard. "I want you to assume that I love you and I won't stop just because of what happened." Sasuke spoke evenly, but those words knocked the shit out of him. Naruto couldn't stop the way his eyes widened. The raven's sable eyes were serious and completely genuine. "I truly do love you… you could murder someone and my feelings wouldn't change." Sasuke tentatively raised his hands, cupping Naruto's face tenderly. A small blush formed on Naruto's cheeks.

Black eyes bore into blue. "Don't doubt my love for you."

Naruto's previous anger and frustration dissipated instantly with those words, leaving him feeling light with clarity. He felt like he had been on an emotional roller coaster and felt glad to be on solid ground again, with his best friend. "Sasuke…" Naruto couldn't look into those black eyes anymore. "I'm sorry."

Sasuke lowered his hands, making Naruto miss the warmth instantly. "Dobe." he smirked, forgiving him.

It was strange. Life a few minutes ago was horrible and just plain sucked and now… everything was alright. Everything was back in order. Sasuke was just busy Naruto smiled, slowly bringing his arms around his best friend. "Really… I'm sorry." he said, feeling truly stupid. He couldn't believe he had doubted the one person in his life that had always been there for him. That had truly loved him despite having a thousand year old demon in him.

Sasuke tensed in his hold for a few seconds _'Don't hug the person you've rejected.'_ Sasuke mentally said before bringing his own arms around his waist. "Don't worry about it." his words were feathered across Naruto's ear.

They stood in silence for a bit, enjoying each other's presence after not seeing one another for a long time. Sadly, they forgot the door was open. "Umm… am I interrupting something?" Tsunade's voice gave off a smirk.

The separated instantly, or more like Naruto jumped away.

-

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-

Sasuke walked home alone after leaving Naruto at the Hokage's tower. Outwardly, he remain calm but everything was always a different story when you were inside. The last couple of weeks, he had been, truly, busy with ANBU exams and their nominees. His sleeping and eating problems fluctuated and still were irregular. Everyone around him had noticed that he had lost weight, and when he got on a scale, he had found that he had lost ten pounds.

He had casually been in the Hokage's tower when he had sensed Naruto's chakra and went to at least say "Hi". Although, actually saying hi would be weird, so he just settled for showing up. He was startled when he seen Naruto hulk an obviously heavy box of scrolls across the room and damned some bastard. And Naruto never referred anyone but Sasuke as a bastard.

So when he had spoken up, and saw the anger in Naruto's usually bright and happy blue eyes, and 'accuse' him of not really loving the blond, he was naturally pissed.

But he couldn't believe Naruto hugged him the way he did! He almost wanted to hit the idiot over the head _"Don't hug me!! I'm trying to cope with the fact that I can't _have_ you!!"_ but of course, he didn't do such a thing.

Letting out a slow breath, Sasuke thought back to the way it felt… actually felt to be in Naruto arms. It was far better than he ever thought it would feel.

Naruto's arms were firm and strong and they seemed to fit perfectly around him. Naruto skin -he was cheek to cheek with the blond- was incredibly soft to the touch softer than any silk he had ever touched. Goose bumps appeared on his arms but Sasuke absently rubbed them and continued thinking. Naruto had smelt good too. It was a smell that was hard to explain, but it was to be expected. Naruto wasn't suppose to put cologne on or even use heavily scented shampoo. Ninjas could smell you, especially if you were from a clan like the Inuzukas. Naruto smell was completely natural and being in his arms felt natural too.

'_Ok.'_ Sasuke ran a hand through his hair, _'That enough of that.'_ the more he thought about it, the more he wanted Naruto. He needed to have some control.

Naruto had specifically said that Sasuke was important to him, but he wouldn't… couldn't be in a relationship with him. The reasons he had given had opened Sasuke's eyes slightly.

…slightly.

"_I'm going to he Hokage, Sasuke." Naruto had buried his face in his hands, "It wouldn't look good if I was found sneaking around with the sole Uchiha heir behind everyone's back."_

Finding company in another male wasn't something unheard of amongst ninjas… but it wasn't something that was frowned upon. All the Kage's in history had either been single or married. It was one of those unspoken rules that it was either those two things or nothing.

But Sasuke didn't care about that. There was always a first time for everything.

"_And Konoha expects you to revive the clan Sasuke. Sure that's a long while from now, but it'll only hurt us in the end. Loving someone for only a limited amount of time, knowing they were eventually going to be snatched away from you… I don't want that Sasuke."_

First of all, Konoha can kiss Sasuke's pale ass when it came to reviving the clan. He was young when he had said that… thirteen fucking years old! Sasuke hated to say it, but he didn't know what the hell he was talking about back then! That was a ways before he started loving Naruto.

'_But…'_ Sasuke smirked, looking at the sky as the wind blew his hair to the side. _'I've decided that I'm not going to give up that easily.'_ Thinking back on their conversation, Sasuke hadn't heard Naruto say once that he wasn't interested. He gave excuses like they had 'obligations' and other bullshit. The Uchiha didn't know what to think of it. Did it mean that he wanted Sasuke, but didn't want the troubles that came along with it? Or had Naruto just specifically _chose_ not to say it?

Over the weeks of thinking about it, Sasuke had decided to just let it go. To not risk their already fragile friendship. But after what just happened, the willingness to just outright hug Sasuke after… after _everything_, Sasuke had came to a decision.

Sasuke had decided just then, that he couldn't just stop there. After being in Naruto's arms for mere seconds and the rightness of it, his convictions were set in stone along with the determine gaze he had.

'_I'll have you Naruto… I'll just have to show you more of me. Pull you in the right directions and make you question, even yourself.'_

**TBC...**

_So I've decided to continue :) Thanks for the positive response, everyone! I hope that you continue to review!_

_Please, review and tell me what you think about the chapter!_


	3. Hopelessness

**Here Chapter Three!! Extremely sorry that it took so long! Sh-love you guys!**

**Title: 7 Stages of Acceptance**

**Disclaimer: As much as I'd like to… I don't own Naruto.**

**-**

**-**

**Excerpt:**

**Third Stage: Hopelessness **

**Inability to cope with daily tasks or mental confusion can have a demoralizing effect. Feelings such as "why should I bother to try" occur when something doesn't work the way it is supposed to. For example; fatigue doesn't improve with sleep. By refusing to accept their limits and make changes, the person may accept defeat and admit failure.**

**-**

_Everything was hot._

_The bedding he laid on, his skin, his breath, even the air itself seemed to be scorching. _

'_But why?' he questioned himself as he felt large hands run down his sides, to his thighs and slowly moving to the inner, more intimate parts. Those calloused yet gentle hands slowly parted his legs, making him willingly expose every private part of him. _

"_Sasuke…" those lips breathed, making him even hotter._

_Those hands then started to tease Sasuke. Slowly and lightly tracing his length, lazily fondling his balls, rubbing the inside of his thigh and then that mouth… God that mouth, started at his neck while his hands continued their job downward. _

_Teeth bit, nibbled and over all abused the skin while his tongue and lips soothed the damage that was done. And slowly, ever so slowly, they inched downward._

_Loving kisses on his chest, little suckles on his perked nipples, an open mouth kiss to his navel, all of it made him whine in frustration. He wished his lover would just get on with it, to stop this sweet torture and just take him._

_But it felt so good, that he never wanted it to end. To just bask in this kind of loving attention, it was.. It was…_

_Suddenly, a hand tightened around the base of his cock and that hot mouth swallowed him whole. The urge to cum was there with all the teasing, it was so close, but that hand was tight! It hurt and kept him from finding release!_

_He writhed uncontrollably, thrusting upward but was some how managed to be restrained. His lover was so strong in these kinds of moments and that fact only heightened his pleasure. Not having control, being completely vulnerable, it was one of the things he got off on. His gasps and groans came out quicker and more frequent. His lover's mouth was suctioned tight and worked him to the brink of insanity as he tried to holdout by clutching his lover's blond hair._

_But he knew he couldn't, he pleaded, begged for that hand to let him go. And his lover was merciful. Mouth became tighter and that hand let go completely. But it was short-lived when the mouth disappeared completely, leaving him on edge and trembling. How could his lover be so cruel? Why wouldn't he let him have his release? _

_Suddenly, a lubed finger slipped inside of him, making him arch uncontrollably off of the bed. He moaned as they wiggled around. His lover continued to draw noises from him as that hot mouth took his nipple, the suction becoming tighter and more fingers were slipped in. Those fingers were always gentle, no matter how much he pleaded to hurry._

_The fingers slipped out and seemed to take all his energy as he slumped back on the bed. This was it, he thought, his lover would make love to him. He smiled at the thought as his legs were brought up and rested on those strong tanned shoulders._

"_Are you ready?" his voice was thick with lust, blue eyes looked impossibly dark. He answered by leaning up kissing him. God, how he loved this man. He wanted to hold him, keep him for himself, and never let go. Was love suppose to make you selfish and greedy?_

_His lover's tip pressed and teased his entrance, tracing it firmly before sliding inside. Sasuke's energy seemed to return as he arched off of the bed, clawing his lover's shoulders and back as more slid in. His lungs refused to take in air. He was drowning, he was being penetrated, he was being loved. A warmth, never felt before, spread throughout his body as his lover seated himself completely._

_His lungs finally started working, making him pant and tremble. Small kisses were placed on his forehead, hands ran up and down his sides before wander to his erection. He whimpered helplessly, baring his neck at which the hot mouth attached itself to instantly._

_His nipples were played with, his erection was being teased once again, his neck was highly sensitive and slowly, every so slowly, his lover was pulling out. A loving kiss was placed on his lips before his knees were pushed to touch his own shoulders, and his lover's cock slammed back into him, making him cry out loudly._

"NARUTO!!" Sasuke's eyes snapped open as he arched off his bed unexpectedly and fell back down to the bed with a thump. The room was dark and quiet. The first things that became apparent was that one; he was alone in bed. Instantly letting him know that it was another wet dream. Two; his boxers were sticky and wet and his entrance was quivering slightly, he was very hard and frustrated. Three; he had yelled… and it would be a miracle if Naruto didn't hear him. Well, Sasuke thought, he was trying to be more 'touchy feely' with the blond… and yelling his name while having a wet dream could be qualified as 'messing with his head'. Sasuke was bound to have wet dreams, and he was sure Naruto knew this much.

Sitting up, Sasuke glared down at his boxers. Great, now he needed to change.

Sasuke crab-walked out of his room, trying to avoid the stickiness as much as possible as he waddled to the bathroom.

In his room, Naruto stared up at the ceiling, wide eyed.

-

-

-

-

In the morning, breakfast was insanely awkward. Sitting at the kitchen table, silence reigned with an occasional scrape of a fork and sipping sounds. The only thing he had heard from Sasuke was a 'Good morning' and an unnoticeably shy glance, that only Naruto and Naruto alone, would be able to catch. That look, spoke out loud that Sasuke knew Naruto might've heard him. 'He must be embarrassed.' He sipped his orange juice. Naruto knew he was… he had gotten hard again last night and that alone had killed all hope for sleep last night. He kept waking up from dreams of him and Sasuke having… _'Ahem. Lets stop there.'_ Naruto closed his eyes frowning, sporting a small blush.

Naruto longed for the normality to return to their friendship. The ability to look up and smile at Sasuke without straining. To be able to run up and hug Sasuke without feeling nervous and sheepish. Naruto toyed with his food; his appetite seemed to have vanished the past couple of days. He didn't even have a craving for Ichiraku, and that was bad. Naruto figured that if he was doing bad on this end, then Sasuke must've been doing far worst than he. He looked at Sasuke through his bangs, watching the Uchiha eat.

Maybe he should've… do something. He could tell that Sasuke was physically suffering from his weight loss and paler than usual skin. Naruto could only imagine what Sasuke was going through mentally. How hard it could be seeing Naruto everyday, knowing that his love would remain unrequited. If Naruto was in the same position as Sasuke, would he be taking it this well? _'No where as near…' _Naruto pressed his lips in a thin line. He wanted Sasuke to be ok again.

'_Maybe I should take the initiative.'_ Naruto tried to think of something he could ask Sasuke.

A light bulb quietly shined over his head but managed to keep a nonchalant face. "Sasuke, are you doing anything tonight?" Kiba had asked if they wanted to spend the night out. Naruto hadn't been drinking with Sasuke in a while, he was sure that if they did, they would forget about everything for a while and just be normal. And maybe everything will turn for the better afterwards.

Sasuke glanced up from his meal, thinking to himself. "Unless something comes up today… no." Curiosity shone in his black eyes.

"Well," Naruto closed his eyes, chewing his food. "Kiba wanted to hang out tonight…"

The sentence was left Sasuke to fill in. The last time he had 'hung out' with Kiba and Naruto, it had consisted of alcohol and them running around Konoha with toilet paper. They had spent most of that night, tepee-ing fifty trees (They counted), throwing eggs at Shino's house while screaming self-righteously (Kiba), running away and falling (Naruto), and walking around the training grounds half-naked (Sasuke). It had been a night that had been disastrous yet… fun in an odd way.

But on the down side, it had been weeks until all of the toilet paper came completely out of the trees, a few months and repainting for Shino to be able to get the eggs off of his house, and Sasuke twenty-four hours to get rid of the headache given to him by his hangover. Since then, he was constantly given looks and was told that he was quite the drunk. He talked a lot, had hung onto Naruto the whole night, and had laughed. He was even the one who had the idea to tepee all those trees. Alcohol had made him act completely out of behavior, loosen his tongue, and made him make bad decisions.

Sasuke looked/glared at his breakfast. Also, Naruto and Kiba could hold their liquor, and he couldn't. This was the bad thing, but it didn't stop there. He knew that if he wasn't moderate with his drinking, he just wouldn't remember anything he did in the morning, unless Naruto or Kiba told him.

So… should he spend the night drunk with Naruto, who knew that he loved him or just sit at the house by his lonesome? Personally, Sasuke didn't want a repeat of that night again… but if Naruto wanted him to go, then he would go… but just not drink. "Sure."

"Awesome!" Naruto smiled that smile that made everything worth it, "He said that he knows a bartender that will allow us to drink, so all we have to do is pay." Great, everything was going to be alright!

So, Naruto was naturally upset when, later on that night, he heard from Sasuke that he wasn't going to be drinking. "Why not?"

Sasuke pushed his hands into his pant pockets. "Because I don't want to do… stupid things again." a small blush played out on his cheeks. "Stupid things?" Naruto acted like he didn't know what had happened. "We didn't do stupid things! Those things were fun!"

Sasuke gave him a dry look. "I only remember half of that night. I don't like not being able to recall things." he started walking to the place they were meeting Kiba.

Naruto jogged after him, "C'mon Sasuke! It'll be weird if everyone else is drinking but you. Don't you want to have fun! You had fun with us last time we played tag without our pants-" Sasuke almost pulled a 'Naruto' and put his hands over his ears and screamed 'I can't hear you! Lalala!' "I don't want to drink tonight, Uzumaki." he used Naruto's last name, letting him know he was serious.

Naruto stopped walking, obviously pouting. "Then I don't want to go."

Sasuke rose a brow, as he stopped also. "You're going to leave Kiba there?"

A frown was place on Naruto's handsome face. "But, I'm not going knowing that you're staying sober." his arms crossed. "I want to have a good time with you… when you're drunk." he added the last part sheepishly.

"Why does it matter?" Sasuke wasn't going to drink tonight. Sasuke knew was he was doing this time around and at the moment, knew that this would enable him to keep his head straight for the night. But he had never been asked like this to drink. _'Heh, is this what peer pressure is?'_

Naruto struggled with his next words. "I just- I don't want-" he stopped, taking a deep breath. _'I just want us to forget… even if it's for a while.'_ Naruto knew he could say that without being questioned. "Fine." He glared at the Uchiha. "Don't drink." he brushed past Sasuke, walking or more like stomping down the street. Sasuke followed wordlessly, trying to figure out the situation.

When they arrived, Kiba along with Shikamaru was waiting. Naruto smiled, "Shika! Hey, I didn't know you were going to be here!" Kiba himself smiled broadly, "It was a last minute thing." The Inuzuka was taller than Naruto by a little bit. Shikamaru was more or less Sasuke's height.

The small group walked inside, Sasuke sat at the bar sighing.

"Can I get you anything?" the bartender asked, drying a cup.

"Nothing at the moment." Sasuke said as Shikamaru sat down next to him. The Nara casually pulled out a cigarette. "Uchiha."

"Nara" Sasuke tilted his head in greeting but not looking at him. They sat in silence before the lazy-nin spoke. "You and Naruto seemed stressed."

At first it had taken him a while to register what the other had said, but when it did, Sasuke's eyes widened. He knew that he had been stressed, but Naruto? He hadn't noticed any changes in the blond, but he guessed that something like that would happen. If you saw someone everyday, you more prone not to notice things such as stress, especially if that one person hid it well. Only someone on the outside would take note. "Really?" he said as Shika flicked an ash off of the cig'. the Nara threw him a side glance, "You've both loss weight and look tired as hell."

Sasuke tried not to give any indication that he was bothered. Shikamaru continued. "You both are tense, too." a puff of the cigarette. "I think it would've been better to go to a hot spring or something but I guess this is good too. Alcohol loosens the body." the Nara ordered a bottle of… something. Sasuke hadn't caught the name because he was still processing what he heard.

'_How could I miss it? Is it that obvious?'_ Sasuke brooded slightly.

Naruto, a small ways from Sasuke, looked around the room. There was quite a few people, some that looked familiar and others that didn't. His blue eyes glanced over at the Uchiha. _'Sasuke does some questionable things when he his drunk, but its nothing major._' he huffed slightly, grabbing his drink, downing it. Well, whether Sasuke drank or not, Naruto planned to get wasted. For one night, he wanted to forget.

-

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-

-

It was at least two thirty in the morning as Sasuke watched his peers. Shikamaru was still as laid-back as ever, but you could tell he was drunk by hearing his slight speech impairment. Kiba was loud and obnoxious, plain and simple. Naruto was surprisingly collective when he was drunk. The only thing that was incredibly off was his coordination and decision making.

Sasuke watched as Naruto laughed about something Kiba said something. Shikamaru mumbled about something being troublesome, just as Naruto stood and climbed on the tiny round table, making it wobble. _'Shit.'_ Sasuke stood as Naruto was now trying to balance himself on the table. "Naruto!" Sasuke grabbed the blond's wrist, "Get off the table!"

Naruto's wrist was snatched away from him. "Stop telling me what to do!" Naruto yelled. Kiba laughed loudly, slapping his knee while Shika muttered, "T'rblesome."

It didn't take long for an employee come by. "Sir, please, I'm going to have to ask you to leave. You are disturbing the other costumers." Naruto growled softly to himself and jumped off the, now, shaky table as Kiba let out a long "Aw!" sound. Behind Sasuke, Shikamaru stood, swaying a bit, and walked towards them.

Naruto jumped off the table and was heading towards the door. Sasuke followed him, hearing Kiba say, "Hmm… M'be I should get some more sake before I go."

"Naruto! Hey!" Sasuke grabbed the blond's arms. "Do you even know where you're going?" He watched the blond look around. "Wow." Hazy blue eyes looked at his, a drunken smiled placed on his lips. "That's a very good question, Sasuke." Sasuke's eyes widened as long tanned arms came loosely around his neck and Naruto's cheek rubbed against his pale on. "Have I ever told you how smart you are?"

Sasuke blushed slightly, "Not really." he didn't give much of an attempt to push the blond away. This was the closest they'd been in a long time. But Naruto still clung tighter, "Well, you're smart." he said like Sasuke didn't know, reaching up and ruffling Sasuke's hair. "Oi!" Kiba's voice came from behind them, and Naruto didn't jump away like he did when Tsunade saw them. Sasuke looked over his shoulder and saw the brunette holding three white bottles. "One is for Naruto and one is for you, Sas'ke." Kiba slurred happily. Sasuke looked and saw Shikamaru had one of his own.

"I don't think Naruto needs anymore-" Sasuke started to say but Naruto reached out, grabbing the bottles Kiba offered. "Tanks." He slurred, "But Sasuke hasn't been drinking… doesn't want to."

'_You mean, they still haven't noticed?'_ Sasuke thought dryly. Kiba tilted his head to the side and nearly fell over, "Huh? Why?" He drawled out the last word like a philosopher. Naruto laughed at this. "I dunno."

"Are you guys seriously talking about me as if I'm not here?" Sasuke asked, Naruto slowly leaning all of his weight on him making he struggle to find balance. "Plus, I don't think this one needs anymore." he tried to reach for the bottles, at least one of them, but the blond's arms were longer than his. Naruto giggled at Sasuke futile attempts.

Shikamaru looked at the two before glancing up at the star lit sky. "So, t'what you guy wanna do now?" he lightly look a sip of his bottle. Kiba shrugged, looking at the stars too. The two had a small mellow moment while, as Naruto lean more on Sasuke. Sasuke straightened himself, "I think I better take him home." Sasuke said with a strained voice that Kiba ignored. _'It would be nice if they'd give me a hand!'_

The brunette ran a hand through his hair, humming to himself. "Yeah, crashing sounds good." Shikamaru nodded, "Yeah, I'm going home too." the raven nods as Kiba mock saluted them both. Sasuke mimicked Shikamaru and Naruto waved, smiling broadly.

The men went their own ways as Naruto chugged one of his bottles and threw it against the ground, enjoying the sound of shattering glass.

It took a while, but Sasuke finally managed to steer Naruto in the direction of their home. Naruto kept on mumbling that he didn't want to go home just yet, but Sasuke wouldn't have any of it. He was tired and he really wanted to go to bed.

Naruto on the other hand, was having unwanted thoughts. With his arm around Sasuke, he could tell how thin the Uchiha was. _'My fault…'_ he thought, sipping on the second bottle.

The gravel crunched beneath their feet and seemed to echo into the quiet night. Naruto had quickly finished off his bottle due to his thinking. "Sasuke?"

"Hn?" the Uchiha grunted, having some difficulty balancing both him and Naruto. He never remembered Naruto being this out of it when they had drank the last time. He must've drank a hell of a lot more. Naruto's mind was still fuzzy but he still felt the need to say something. Something he wanted to say but found he couldn't since that night he told Sasuke they could only be friends. "M'sorry."

Sasuke frowned, what was the dobe talking about this time? "Sorry about what?"

Naruto looked frustrated, "Just everything!" he suddenly yelled, echoing into the night. Sasuke stopped them both in favor of diverting all of this attention on the blond. Naruto continued, eyes getting watery. "I'm a fucking horrible friend! I thought that if I got you drunk, everything would be alright and we could go back to the way we use to be!" he started sniffling, turning to look at Sasuke. The blond then started talking about something else. "I don't even understand why you love me! I'm whiny, I don't think a lot, I do stupid things like standing on tables, I cry when I'm drunk-" he started ranting but there was one thing that caught Sasuke's attention the most. "I don't even think I'm that good looking!" Naruto rubbed his eyes, roughly. "And now it's going to be weird because I'm actually talking about it! I just want things to be normal again! We can't even stand next to each other with out feeling weird! Plus, you've been losing weight and that ain't cool-"

Sasuke stood wide eyed. He couldn't believe Naruto was actually saying all of this. He had always thought that the rejection only affected him and Naruto wasn't fazed. Sasuke had a faint smile on his lips. _'Drunken words are sober thoughts.'_ He wasn't the only one that had walked around with the same weight on his chest. _'And he doesn't think he is good looking.' _For some reason, that fact made Naruto even more attractive. It meant that he was modest and genuinely didn't pay a lot of attention on his looks. The way Naruto looked was just natural. He was naturally good looking.

"I feel hopeless..." Naruto was hiding his face in his hands, letting go of Sasuke and swaying a bit. "like I've seriously lost everything now." his voice trembled and Sasuke would hear another wave of tears coming again. "And there isn't a damn thing I can do about it!" Sasuke watched as he looked up, more tears were leaking out of Naruto's wet blue eyes, making him look lost. The love of his life, sobbed, reaching forward, hugging him close as if that would make everything go away. "You're," his voice caught, and he tried again. "You're the closest thing to a family I have." Sasuke's eyes widened. "And I don't want to lose you." Naruto's voice was thick with the emotion that threatened to block his throat.

Sasuke found he could only comfort the blond, rubbing his back and shoosh-ing his sobs. He would've never thought that when he woke up with morning, that he would be comforting Uzumaki Naruto, while he was drunk out of his mind. "I didn't know that you felt this way." Sasuke murmured, tightening his hold on Naruto as a choked sob shook his frame. "You should've said something to me." Sasuke closed his eyes, leaning his head against Naruto's. The warmth he felt from Naruto words made him feel… lighter than he had the past few days. "I'll never leave you, Naruto."

He continued to hold the blond, hesitantly at first, but placing tender kisses on the side of Naruto's face. "You're not a horrible friend." -kiss- "You're the reason why I'm here." -kiss- "And they say, you sometimes love the people who are nothing like you," -kiss- "because you wish you could be them." -kiss- Sasuke pulled the blond's face out of his neck, looking him in the eyes. "The way I see it, one of the reasons I love you is because you are everything I'm not Naruto."

Naruto completely ruined the mood, sobbing out in a high pitched voice, "I complete you?" -sniffle-

It took everything Sasuke had to keep a serious face. "Yeah," but a shaky smile became apparent. "You complete me." Naruto's eyes watered a bit more before he dived back into the raven's arms.

The warmth and affection Sasuke had shown, hit him hard and in his drunken state, he emotionally didn't stand a chance, _'I don't deserve Sasuke.' _he thought, burying his nose in the condors of Sasuke's neck. Then, a thought came into his head, leaving no origins as to where it came from. "Sasuke… can I ask a favor?" he asked, slowly moving back and taking Sasuke's hands and holding them in his own.

There was a barely noticeable blush on Sasuke and Naruto felt his heart twist at the sight. "What is it?" Sasuke said. He could only imagine what the drunken blond would ask. _'Or maybe I shouldn't have asked.'_

Naruto's drunken mind hesitated. _'I want to do this.'_ he told himself, closing his eyes, taking a deep breath. Maybe he was throwing everything way out of proportion, maybe he was confused about Sasuke and his own feelings, maybe he was completely and totally scared.

Or maybe he was an incredibly drunk that could barely stand on his own and just wanted something he had no fucking clue about. But Naruto knew one thing… he didn't care at the moment. _'I'm looking forward to regretting this.'_

"Kiss me." Naruto opened his eyes, a determined and 'for sure' gaze, locked with Sasuke's. "Please."

Startled, Sasuke was instantly reminded of how serious and collective the blond could be. Was Naruto seriously asking that? Had he heard wrong? The wind was blowing, maybe he was hearing things. "Excuse m-me?" Sasuke felt the grip on his hand, tighten, the blush on his face becoming more evident. But Naruto's question was the only warning he was given, as slightly chapped lips were pressed clumsily against the corner of his mouth.

Sasuke's intellect went straight out of the window. He couldn't believe that this was happening. Naruto may have been a little off, but he was still doing it. _'He's kissing me!'_ his mind screamed, hands still trapped in Naruto's.

The fight left him as Sasuke's eyes lowered, moving his lips to press against Naruto's more fully.

The blond's lips were unlike anything he had ever left. His heart tightened as how easily and perfectly the way their lips molded together. It was heavenly. How was it possible that he was able to get a taste of what he wanted, needed, and not have it. The only way he could explain was… it like holding food in front of a starving man. Letting him smell and see it, but expect him not to want or grab for it. Fate was cruel, Naruto was cruel, but right now, none of that mattered. He was allowed this one little taste and there was no way he was going to pass it up.

Naruto lifted Sasuke's hands, placing them on his own shoulders before pulling the Uchiha closer. Even in his drunken haze, he could feel the way his heart jumped and sped up. Was this how he was suppose to feel when he kissed Sasuke? Was this normal? If Naruto didn't love him, was he suppose to feel this way? Or what if it was just the attraction? What was the difference?

Tentatively but almost eagerly, Naruto pressed harder, pulling Sasuke impossibly closer. Sasuke's had tightened his arms around his neck, tilting his head to the side as their lips were crushed together. The longing of those years started to break lose, making him feel needy. He was finally kissing Naruto, something that had only been dreamt of, he was finally doing it.

Instantly, both of them wanting more, they slicked their tongues out at the same time and were surprised to have met each other. Sasuke moaned as his body shuddered as his whole being heated, the effect Naruto had on his body was great but not shocking. Even when Naruto didn't know about Sasuke's love, the smallest touch sent jolts throughout Sasuke. It would only be natural that in an intimate situation, he would be overwhelmed like this.

Small smacking sounds came soon and that sound alone was welcomed by the Uchiha. At first, they struggled in their kiss, both wanting control and not willing to give it up. Sadly, in his drunken state, Naruto relented and allowing Sasuke to control the kiss. As he did, the raven noticed that the alcoholic taste was greater and had dulled the natural taste he had wanted when kissing the blond. But he didn't linger on it long, he was just glad he had this opportunity. Their teeth clashed as Sasuke tongued Naruto, his lips became sorely bruised but he was loving every bit of it.

Then, Sasuke's hair was tugged back, tearing his mouth away from Naruto. The hand continued pulling and Sasuke found he was being roughly pushed back, landing on his back. The ground was surprisingly colder compared to how hot he was a few moments ago. Suddenly, Naruto was on top of him, his mouth latched painfully sweet on his neck, replacing the heat that had been lost. _'He's marking me._' the primitive part of his mind thought as Sasuke moved his head to the side giving Naruto room. All of this seemed like a vivid dream and all he could do was wait to wake up. Would he wake up, only to be alone in the bed, hard and wanting? _'God.. I hope not.'_

Naruto's mouth alternated between suckling and licking to biting and pulling on the pale and tender skin, drawing hisses and gasp from Sasuke; All the while, the raven welcomed the mark that was going to be there. It literally jumped out of his skin and spoke that he and Naruto shared this moment, something even the blond won't be able to deny.

"Sasuke…" Naruto breathed, now looking down at the Uchiha. It was just like in his dreams. Sasuke would be underneath him, panting, hair splayed out, cheeks flushed and a deep red mark would be on his neck. But this was so much better than a dream, so much more. Naruto could feel how soft his skin was as he ran a hand run up Sasuke shirt, running his thumb over his nipple. He could see how Sasuke bit his lip, holding a gasp in as the younger pinched the nub. 'I want to do that.' Naruto thought before lowering himself to that hot mouth he'd grown addicted to.

This time, Sasuke let Naruto have control and was surprised to feel that this kiss was incredibly tender. A kiss only lovers shared. How could Sasuke feel such a thing from Naruto? Even through Sasuke had heard that the blond didn't love him, how could Naruto make him feel such a thing?

While he was thinking, Naruto's slick tongue pulled at his own, touching and dancing with his own. The raven ended his thoughts and took this opportunity to suck on the blond's tongue, pulling a moan out of Naruto that went straight to his groin. They laid there in the grass, a small ways away from the side walk, kissing. The dark night sheltered them and no one would've known that they were there if they hadn't been kissing one another so soundly.

Naruto pulled away, but didn't go far; realizing that kissing Sasuke was certainly an experience, something he would never forget in his life. He rubbed their noses together affectionately, before giving the raven a chaste kiss and was reminded again how soft his lips were. Naruto seriously couldn't help himself right now; he pressed his lips back on Sasuke's and loved how they pressed back, molding themselves perfectly against his.

Pulling back again, Naruto settled himself on top of the breathless Uchiha, resting his head underneath Sasuke's chin, letting the raven's hips cradled his own. The atmosphere around them was so warm and comforting, that neither of them wanted to move.

"Kiba was right…" Naruto's said after a while, nuzzling Sasuke's Adam's apple, his eyes closed.

"What?" Sasuke mumbled, eyes closed along with Naruto's.

Naruto smiled dreamily, "…crashing sounds nice." and no more than a few seconds later, his breathing evened out, letting Sasuke know that he was asleep. The Uchiha laid there in a daze, licking his lips and raising his hands to touch the mark on his neck. _'Did that really just happen?'_

Naruto shifted, cuddling closer. The blond acted like kissing him wasn't a big deal at all. _'Was it really ok to do this?'_ he brought a hand up to Naruto's hair, stroking it tenderly, making the blond sigh. 'Is he going to regret doing this in the morning?' He thought looking at the night sky. _'Will he even remember?'_

Sasuke sighed heavily. "What am I going to do?"

-

-

-

-

"Argh…" blue eyes opened to see a bright room, only to clench them closed. Naruto never had gotten hangovers after drinking the night before, but he always felt groggy and irritable.

"Ohayo." a voice came from the door way of his room. Sasuke had a glass of water and was giving him a guarded look. _'Huh? What's wrong with him?'_

"Ohayo." Naruto sat up, taking the glass from him, sipping it gratefully.

It was quiet for a reason unknown to the blond. Last night was fuzzy, so he couldn't recall anything at the moment. "So… how's everything going?"

Sasuke looked at him for a while longer before answering. "Everything is fine.. I guess." He sighed, running a hand through his hair.

"You guess?" Naruto pulled the covers off of him, standing stiffly. "Is there something wrong?"

Sasuke saw the sincere concern in the blond's eyes. Did he really not remember last night? They had taken a huge step last night, how could Naruto just not remember? "No, nothing is wrong." The Uchiha turned his head, looking out the blond's window, intentionally leaving his neck wide open.

Naruto caught sight of a rather huge red mark, taking residence of the raven's neck. _'What…?'_

Suddenly, images of last night came crashing into his head. Hanging onto the raven, crying out little confessions and most of all, making out with him. _'God, I remember everything!'_ The softness of Sasuke's skin, how flushed his face was after he had kissed him, his smell, the way he sounds when he was sucking on his neck, everything! Uzumaki Naruto had kiss Uchiha Sasuke last night!! It was fucking official! _'Oh dear god!'_ Naruto slowly brought his hand up to his mouth.

Naruto's eyes were wide, his mind in a huge scramble. Now things were going to be even more awkward! What should he say? Was there anything he could say to make the situation better? It wasn't like Sasuke forced himself on Naruto, it was the fucking opposite! He had even pushed Sasuke on the ground!

He needed to get out of here. Now. _'I'm not running away, its just… a tactful retreat.'_ Naruto tried to convince himself.

Sasuke looked back at the blond to find him hastily digging through his drawers. "Naruto?"

Naruto's head snapped up, "Uh, I remembered that I have to, um, meet Tsunade-baa-chan for something. I think I might be late for it. Heh, she's going kill me, you know." he replied a little too quickly, laughing nervously. An obvious lie on his part, but Sasuke didn't seem to catch it.

Sasuke watched him scamper out of the room and seconds later, the shower was turned on. The only thought he could think of was, _'Does… he remember?'_

-

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-

Uzumaki Naruto walked down the road, hands in pockets, looking at the ground. If you were up closer, you could see how he swayed from side to side, the huge bags under his eyes and how dull those blue eyes were. The blond looked like a walking zombie. He hadn't realized how tired he was until he walked out the door.

'_Why me? Seriously, what did I do to deserve this?_' he couldn't get his thoughts off of Sasuke's hickey. He could still remember his own feelings about last night. Kissing Sasuke was great, really but Naruto wasn't looking for just a good time. If it was just an attraction, then Naruto would stop feeling like this over time. He didn't want to become physically involved with Sasuke when it was going to be temporary. _'Its been three months since I've started to.'_

Dragging his feet, Naruto continued this way to the Hokage's tower, where he was sure Tsunade had yet another impossible task. Sure he would be a little bit late on the time he usually got there, but the Hokage wouldn't chew him out for it… hopefully. The only things she's been asking him to do lately was finding this and that and reviewing over those and them.

He growled at the thought of finding anything for that old hag today. It was only eight thirty and things had already gone bad.

One, he felt like he hadn't gotten any sleep last night, even though he was piss drunk. His fatigue was finally catching up with him, but he was sure that if he asked to go home early, Tsunade would let him.

He continued to trudge down the street, dragging his feet unnecessarily when a smaller frame slammed into his. "Hey Blondie." Yamanaka Ino's voice purred into his ear, her arms around the back of his neck. Being some one the only blonds in Konoha, they both had this thing about playfully flirting with each other.

Naruto willed himself to smirk, turning to the platinum blond, leaning in close enough to touch nose to nose. "Hey, you going my way?"

Ino broke out in giggles before moving back, "Hokage Tower?"

"Yup." Naruto said as he offered his arm and she took it. Naruto tried to smile. "Tsunade-baa-chan summoned you?"

She nodded, flicking her hair out of her face. "Yeah, I have a feeling it'll be a mission to Suna, though." Ino looked like she was going to add on, but stopped walking, making Naruto do the same. "You ok? You look like crap, Blondie."

He sighed loudly, "Gee, thanks." he tugged her along the way. "Just having problems sleeping."

"That doesn't sound like you." she said as they both arrived at the doors of their destination, Naruto opening the door for her. "If you'd like," She smiled genuinely. "I could whip you up a sedative real quick?" Ino, along with Sakura, had studied under Tsunade and knew quite a deal about medicine.

Naruto could have kissed her. "You'd do that?" a sedative would be just the thing he need. Even Sasuke screaming, wouldn't wake him up.

"Sure." She winked. "I'll have it knock you right out." a small thumbs up. She then spoke in a lower voice. "Even Kyuubi won't stay awake."

Naruto pulled her into a tight hug. He would've asked Sakura to do something like this for him, but he didn't want her to pry. He knew Ino wouldn't ask and would just offer. She had gotten kinder to him, over the years. "Oh Ino, you really do love me!" She smiled brightly before returning the hug. The door opened behind them and Ino could see Sasuke walk in, over the male's shoulder.

"Ohayo Sasuke!" she waved from her position in Naruto's arms. Her smile faded when a glare was sent her way. Not that she wasn't use to the glare over the years, but this one had seemed extra deadly. Naruto had pulled away from her and waved sheepishly at Sasuke. The Uchiha had worn a turtle neck today, but Naruto could still see a little bit of the hickey.

"Ohayo." Sasuke mumbled, looking at Naruto but was still talking to Ino. "I hope I wasn't interrupting anything." The raven was mentally plotting the girls demise. He had known that Naruto and Ino were friendly with each other, but that didn't make it any better on Sasuke's jealousy. He remembered how the night before, how Naruto seemed to never want to let Sasuke go. 'If only it could be like that now.'

"Oh, gosh no!" She laughed, patting Naruto on the arm. "I was just telling Naruto that I-" A large hand muffled the rest of the sentence. Naruto sighed gratefully as stopping her in time. The Uchiha was the last person he wanted to let know. "Uh, she was just telling me about… er, the mission she's going on. I was hugging her goodbye." He smiled as Ino rose a brow behind his hand and Sasuke frowned.

Sasuke obviously didn't buy this at all. _'He doesn't want me to know something.'_ The jealously became greater, flaring in the pit of his stomach.

"Well!" Naruto couldn't take much more of this tense moment. "Heh, Ino and I have to go. See you later Sasuke!" he then dragged Ino away, making sure to keep his hand over her mouth.

"What the hell was all that about?" she said after removing his hand and placing her hands on her hips. Things like this deserved an explanation.

"I just don't want Sasuke to know. Keep this between me," he looked at her seriously, motioning between the two of them. "and you. Ok?" Ino stared him down for a bit before nodding slowly. "Sure." she decided it would be good to change the subject. If it was something to hide from Sasuke, then it had to be serious. "You'll be here, right? I'll drop off the," She looked around, "'item' before I leave."

He smiled, "Thanks." and watched as Ino walked away from him. He hated hiding things from Sasuke, but couldn't help it. He just didn't know how to explain himself. Not taking care of himself and being exhausted over everything that evolves Sasuke, and then just up and kissing his best friend when he had rejected him, it just complicates things. It made things even worst, that even though kissing Sasuke was mind blowing, he didn't regret it like he thought he would.

Suddenly, the fatigue that was looming over him, crashed down on him, like a bolder, weighing his body down. Naruto felt that he didn't have the energy to move, all he could do was manage to stand there. Dizziness soon followed afterwards, making him slump slightly against the wall.

Shizune was carrying papers for Tsunade when she caught sight of him. "Ohayo, Naruto-kun." when he didn't reply she naturally became worried. "Is everything alright?" Naruto tilted his head to the side, looking at her but couldn't find it in himself to answer. Over the years of taking great care of himself, making sure he ate, clothed and bathed himself regularly and making sure he had gotten enough sleep, Naruto knew damn well how to survive on his own. When had it gotten this bad?

His sleeping patterns for the past month or so had been completely disrupted and irregular. He wasn't use to having sleeping problems beside an occasional nightmare. But he would cure that by training so intensely, that he was too tired to dream.

Should he train in this kind of condition? Could he train? He hardly had the energy to raise his own hand to scratch his nose. For all the chakra the Kyuubi no Kitsune had, he felt that it was all sucked away from him in that instant, making it a huge chore to even stand.

Naruto's vision had blurred to nothing, until eventually, darkness came over him.

TBC...

-

**Some might question why Sasuke didn't stop after tasting the alcohol on Naruto's breath and I have an explaination.**

I have a best friend, who is a guy, and I didn't want to drive home drunk one night. The place I had a party at, was just up the street from him, so I walked to his house.

Little did I know, my friend liked me... and one thing led to another and we started making out. He said that when he tasted the alcohol, he _thought_ about stopping, cause he knew it was wrong... but it was me. He said he didn't know whether or not this would be his only chance to kiss me or not.

**Sounds like a fanfiction, right? So I thought I'd use this in my fic :)**

**Thanks for being so paitent with me! Review please!**


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